Lookin’ Fresh!

One of the fun parts of writing erotica is giving rein to all sorts of raunchy, taboo, impossible sexual fantasies. Like most fiction authors, ideas for my stories primarily come from my imagination. And I have a seriously dirty mind.

Not everyone gets off on the same thing, and that’s why erotica is so wonderful, because it offers a chance to explore your interests — and their limits — in a fun, safe, and relatively inexpensive way. (All you need is a vivid imagination! And that comes free.) As a result of this marvelous diversity, all of us will come across stories that just aren’t our thing. Some stories push our envelope a little too much, or cross a line we discover to be, for us, inviolable.

I’ve written one story like that: Her Birthday Breeding. I am proud to say that it is my one and only story dirty enough to be relegated to Amazon’s infamous “adult dungeon,” and therefore unsearchable. You’re welcome, world.

As a result of the spicy subject matter, this is not everyone’s cup of tea. (Or herbdaybreedingcoverrather, coupe de champagne!) Frequent comments are “I wasn’t comfortable with the concept,” or “it only makes sense if the husband was sterile.” (Surely, it couldn’t just be for the fun of it!) Evolutionarily speaking, few things should be more exciting to a man than being in direct genetic competition with another male; or to a woman than to be the joyful participant in said competition. (Don’t believe me? Do some reading!) If that sounds like fun to you, then this is your kind of story.

Also, my cover skills have dramatically improved since I made the original. This hot little fantasy needed a makeover. Inspired by the SNL classic “Dick in a Box” (thank you, Justin Timberlake!) — and please tell me you’ve seen that! (original video is funnier, but this one will do) — I’ve make my own naked-man-holding-a-box design. We all know what’s in there. It’s what I want for my birthday every year! (And Christmas, and Valentine’s Day, and Saturday…)

If you’d like a fun little romp between the sheets with an adventurous married couple and a stud-for-hire, hop on in and enjoy!

Her Birthday Breeding — on Amazon or Smashwords.

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The importance of a varied diet

We all know we need to eat our fruits and vegetables, limit fat and sweets, balance our whole-grain carbohydrates and healthy proteins. The importance of a varied diet is well documented. But the same goes for reading: if we overindulge in our favorite things (and be honest about your sugary favorites!) we end up with rotted teeth and diabetes. Or, in the literary sense, a lazy, mushy mind.

To that end, I encourage everyone — writers especially — to diversify their reading diet. Truly, it keeps your senses sharp, and offers plenty of perspective that can improve your own writing. If you don’t read, you can’t write. Period. (And if you don’t read many different genres and styles, you can’t write well.)

And just so no one can claim I don’t practice what I preach, here is a list of some recent books I have read and enjoyed, more or less in order. Amazon buy links included, as well as genre. With a growing stack on the horizon, I’ll be busily eating my literary vegetables for a long time! (And, you know, indulging in candy bars regularly too…)

Currently reading: The Things They Carried – fiction – The Vietnam War revisited through a series of brief, vivid tales, each a visceral reminder of the horrors of war.

The Cellist of Sarajevo – literary fiction – A gritty, wrenching portrayal of a city under siege, and the struggle to preserve humanity under inhuman circumstances.

Knight of Jerusalem: a biographical novel of Balian d’Ibelin – historical fiction – Well researched and unique, focusing on a little-known character during the medieval Christian occupation of the Holy Land.

The Shipping News – contemporary fiction – Superb characterization, snappy writing, and a darkly humorous look at love, life and struggle in modern-day Newfoundland.

Saga – graphic novel/space opera – One of the best things I have read, ever. Great adventure story, excellent dialogue, and gorgeous artwork. Go get yourself a copy now!

The Sport of Kings – literary fiction – A new take on the dark, gothic Southern family saga. Incest, violence, wealth, and racism intersect in all the worst possible ways.

My Antonia – American fiction – It’s a classic for a reason. People just don’t write like this anymore.

I Won a Basket of Porn – erotica/humor – In case you needed another reason to love author Patient Lee! Hilarious fun poked at small-town politics. Plus sex.

Because Beards – erotica/romance anthology – A fun collection of sexy stories, all with some kind of bearded hero. Some were excellent; all were okay. Plus, it’s for charity!

A Heart’s Promise – romance – On the sweet side, a classic romance novel featuring a horse-loving gal and a hot, modern cowboy.

Little Birds – erotica – Sexy short stories, from back in the day when erotica was all about turning on classy, well-read rich people.

Ancillary Justice – science fiction – An unusual SciFi adventure, featuring a ship that is also, somehow, a person. Totally unique.

All The Light We Cannot See – historical fiction – The kind of book that moves you to tears… and makes you wish you could write like that. Utterly superb.

 

Sex for Christmas!

Being married is pretty great. Now, if I cook dinner, somebody else gets to do the dishes! Not to mention the inarguable benefit of having two paychecks as opposed to one. And a partner for walking the dog. Someone to shower with; saves water.

By far, though, the greatest benefit of marriage is the sex. It should come as no surprise to anyone that sex is one of my favorite things. Although I was no slouch in my wild-and-single days, it’s the simple truth that sex while married is a) more frequent and b) better. Especially if you marry a Frenchman, as I did. I highly recommend it!

Having a French husband comes with its own set of rewards and challenges; like any relationship, except we can mostly chalk down our disagreements to cultural habits and translation errors. He still stays connected to what’s happening across the pond. And this year he found an absolute treasure: the erotic advent calendar!

This little gem works just like a traditional advent calendar. You know; the little windows numbered for each day of December, from the 1st to the 24th. In my childhood, we knew a delicious candy waited behind each of those windows, and the best was always Christmas Eve. Later, it was cute little pictures of candles, or carolers, or wreathes, or bells, and a Nativity scene for the last day. The erotic advent calendar is SO much better! Instead of candy, you get a sexy surprise every day.

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Hohoho indeed!

Sweet little sex toys, lubricants, and all kinds of naughty suggestions — in French, English, and German, no less — await the adventurous couple! Needless to say, our advent season is going to be way more fun. I haven’t looked forward to Christmas this much since I was a kid.

Interested? The good news is you can get on the Amorelie mailing list, so you can be sure to order your sexy calendar for next year. The bad news? It’s currently only available to ship in Europe. (We had my brother-in-law mail it to us; it’s good to have French connections!)

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Thank God the Europeans keep coming up with the best sexy ideas. All that paid vacation time must be good for something!

That means — HELLO American purveyors of sex toys and other goodies! — there’s a serious marketable opportunity here! My husband did his best to find a comparable product in the States, and no luck.  smell a business op! Who’s feeling entrepreneurial? I’m telling you, best countdown to Christmas ever.